Paradigm Shift

Two months ago, I told myself, no more. I need a paradigm shift. Whatever I was doing, whatever I was experiencing, no more. There must be a better way. I had the money and the resources to find the best solutions tailor made for my circumstances. Any problem that can be resolved with money is not a real problem, isn't it? I do not ever want to live life inside a bubble again. 

I am reminded of the Dutch trauma focus program that our EMDR trainer told us about. It's targeted for people with severe trauma and the program involves lots of EMDR (obviously), talk therapy and behavioural activation, i.e. running, swimming, yoga, and other sports, because as we all know, the body keeps the score. I was so intrigued by that program. As someone who aims for the moon and lands on the star, I want to steal some secrets from that program and apply it to my own. The program also reminds me of Run Hong Kong, an NGO that works with refugees and encourages them to run, swim, hike every week. My refugee client became one of the selected few participants and she told me how she had no time to be depressed since she's too busy exercising and learning new skills.

I have obviously done my fair share of interventions, programs and reading. Mindfulness was probably the most helpful for my dissociative symptoms. As my psychologist said, I hadn't master the skills that I was taught. I have learnt the different solutions but I have not resolutely master the skills. Life gets in the way and I've been travelling so much, I haven't had a routine in awhile. I have this app on my phone that tracks the habits that are good for me. I don't open that app for months at a time. I have the solutions but I have to practice it, don't I? Paradigm shift, but I've got to commit, don't I?